I’ve always been told that when you’re “done” having babies, you will undoubtedly know, because deep down in the core of your soul you will feel peace and contentment. That there will be no “what if’s” or “maybe so’s” left unanswered in your heart. And without a shadow of a doubt, your family will feel complete.
I gave birth to my 4th child at the beginning of 2012. And for the most part, I always told myself baby Paul would be rounding out our family as forever the youngest. Because by society’s standards, four children is a lot. Some might even argue that it’s a few too many.
My husband and both come from large families, and it’s been our collective dream to also have a big family. Lucky for us, it’s exactly what we’ve been given.
And you know what? Four children is a ton of work. Way more work than my mother ever let on to. Heck, she made it look easy, compared to how I feel on most days. It’s taxing in every sort of way. Everyday I’m physically, emotionally, and financially spent.
But I absolutely wouldn’t have it any other way.
This past weekend, my husband and I made it official that we are done having biological children. As far as science is concerned, the baby factory has been officially closed for good. So how do I feel about such finality?
Honestly, I’m mournful, but also at complete peace. It’s bittersweet to know I’ll never be pregnant again, or hold new life (that I created) in my arms for the first time. It’s OK to mourn this chapter in my life coming to a close. Babies are so awesome, and the fact that I’ve gotten to raise four is way more that I could have ever asked for out of life.
And when I look ahead, I’m excited for my family’s future. My babies are turning into pretty cool big kids, and we’ve got some magical years ahead of us!
How about you? Did you know when you were done having kids?