On Raising Four Kids but Only One Daughter


All day I’ve been covering a myriad of family dynamics, from being a baby to older siblings, growing up around lots of cousins, being the only granddaughter, the father-daughter bond, and now our final discussion — raising four children but only one daughter!

If you’ve read the other posts you know by now that I have three older boys, and my baby girl is my only daughter. You also know that she has an older sister we lost as a stillborn, so while I am the mother to two daughters, I only get to raise one. You also know that the various dynamics in a family interest me, and I hope they’ve interested you too!

My daughter and I have this crazy connection that bowls me over on a daily basis. I’ve often described it as seing my heart crawl around my house all day, smile at me, snuggle me. It’s like I gave birth to my own soul. I feel I know her so deeply, words really can’t even begin to describe it.

But I don’t think I’m the only mother that feels this way.

I have a special bond with my boys – there is no doubt about that. They are each unique and marvelous and exciting and challenge me every day.

But there’s something about mothering a daughter — don’t you think? It’s hard to describe, but having the honor of raising up another woman is awe-inspiring. She will walk among a world with countless other world-changing women, and I often wonder if she will be a world-changer too. Will she have huge career ambitions or will she be a gypsy like her mother and desire to roam around for a while? Will she live near her parents as an adult (oh please yes!) or will she crave adventure and travel? I can’t help but see myself in her and pray and hope and plead that she doesn’t make the mistakes I made in life, relationships and in accepting who she is. I want her to always be kind to herself.

The connection we have is this crazy spiritual thing that doesn’t exist anywhere else but between mother and daughter. It’s not measured by anything but love and huge monumental kisses. It’s sacred and beautiful and I think all mothers must feel this way about their daughters, but I get to feel this way about mine.

Do you have a daughter that inspires you and moves you in this heart-tugging way?

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