Having a boy and a girl with entirely different personalities has meant meeting their needs and “filling their love tanks” differently.
When I got married, I learned a lot about love languages… but then once I had kids, I realized it applies to them too! Some of it is their gender, some of it is being either first-born or second-born, and most of it is just who they are. They need to be loved in different ways.
My Ainsleigh is tender. You can give her a glance and her feelings are hurt. She needs gentleness, she craves affirmation, and she loves quality time. She has to be handled delicately. She is easygoing and her personality is infectious. Protecting her spirit and loving her well is so important.
My Aiden is a mix between being very sensitive and very physical. He, at times, has a harder time verbalizing his frustrations. He needs to hug and wrestle. He needs physical activity constantly and physical touch. Aiden needs to be loved in a certain way. He needs one-on-one attention and he needs that communication line open.
Aiden turns sandwiches into sharks & dinosaurs. He catches bugs and frogs in the backyard and loves to get dirty. He wants to wrestle and loves “rough” playtime. Ainsleigh squeals when she sees puppies. She makes her toys kiss and she rocks and feeds them to sleep. She loves playing dress up and adores wearing her mama’s shoes. Putting them in a box would never work.
There is no formula, no right way.
Each child has different needs. From the moment these two were born, they have been different, and so meeting their needs will naturally look different! Learning their love languages has been essential as their mama.
Does your baby have a love language? Is it different than yours?