Making Date Nights Count After Baby

Jon and I have been together for nearly 10 years, and for 4 of those we’ve been married. During our freshman year of college, we came up with our Date Night tradition. Once a week, usually on a Wednesday, we would spend the evening together. This would sometimes be a special outing, but most of the time we would do something simple and laid back. This tradition carried on through our marriage and even now that we have Soren. What I always love about Date Night is that no matter how busy and chaotic our week gets, we know we can always count on having time together every Wednesday. It’s a day we keep a special priority.

When we had Soren, we knew it would complicate Date Night, but we wanted to still have intentional time together and figure out a way to make that happen. While we certainly don’t have a sitter every Wednesday and baby sometimes makes an appearance on our date nights, these are a few things we’ve discovered for making date nights count after baby.


Start having date night. One way to make date nights count is to have a date night! Set aside one night each week to be together. Make sure family and close friends know you aren’t available during that night and go ahead and schedule out your calendar. Yes, things might come up now and then, but you’ll be surprised at how consistent you can be once you make it a habit and a priority. Pick a day of the week that fits your schedules and plan your date night on that day. If your schedule is too busy, consider editing your weekly time and making room for a date night. Don’t forget to set a starting time!

Define date night. This evening doesn’t always have to mean getting a sitter, dressing up and spending money. It could mean putting on PJs early, cuddling up and watching a TV marathon, grabbing take-out, or just talking and catching up on life. Your nights can be defined however you’d like! Make a list of date night ideas with baby and a different list when you have a sitter. Be adaptable, try to make the best out of any situation and have fun!

Be adaptable. Be adventurous. Realize that it might not be realistic to alway have a sitter every date night, and if that’s the case, or mostly the case, plan to still have date night even with the kids around. The point is to be intentional and be together. Also remember that kids do (hopefully) eventually go to bed and your date night might not include babies the entire time. When you DO have a sitter, get out! Dress up, plan a unique outing and make memories with your spouse. We love to budget date money each month to have these funds already set aside.

While we love being mommies and dads, it’s SO good for us to make time to really connect with our significant other. It’s so good for the heart!

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