Some days I get a little sad when I think about how big you are getting my sweet Fern Winter. You no longer need to be swaddled or nursed or rocked to sleep. In fact, when bed time rolls around these days you are more than content with a quick kiss and then get quite anxious for me to leave you to sleep in peace. You climb up on chairs by your own strength. You let me know when you would like “beh-fess” (breakfast) or when you would like more “wah-tuh” (water). And as time marches on all-too-fast for my liking and I start to feel like you’ve already got one foot in the door of your college dorm room, I am reminded…you are still little.
When we take you to a little theme park where you barely meet the bumper boat size requirements and I see you peek up over the great, big steering wheel, I remember…you are still little.
When I have to bring your plate back into the kitchen to cut things up just a little bit smaller for your ten, tiny teeth I remember…you are still little.
When you hold out your arms and look up at me to let me know that you would like me to pick you up, I remember…you are still little.
When I have to remind you for the hundredth time in a single day to “please sit down on your bottom” in that chair and that “standing on chairs isn’t safe,” I remember…you are still little.
When I hear your most favorite phrases on repeat (“hi mama! hi dada! hi buddy!”) said in your sweet, sing-songy, pint-sized voice, I remember…you are still little.
When the title for your very best friend in all the world is a tie between a stuffed raccoon and your pet German Shepherd, I remember…you are still little.
When I see the excitement on your face as your little heart is about to burst with joy over some new experience or another, untainted by the apathy or disenchantment that can settle in over the years, I remember…you are still little.
When you wake up sad in the morning and only a “mama hug” will do, I remember…you are still little.
Even though you are growing my sweet girl, you are still little in so many ways and I am treasuring all the little ways that you will still and forever more need me as your mama.