Thanks to Disney for sponsoring this post and giving me the Minnie Mouse Stack and Smile Cups from Sassy for free.
Around here we don’t limit our “bath toys” to bathtime. I’ve discovered there’s something magical that happens when I hand Lola a toy that was specifically reserved for a sudsy sea an hour before bedtime. After the (occasionally) perplexed look fades from her face she begins to play. She’s not inhibited by unwritten rules because really who says bath toys can only be for bathtime?
For several weeks morning daycare drop off became the most difficult part of my day. Sure, work was tough but it couldn’t compare to the feeling I felt when my little one clenched on to me as I prepared to leave her classroom. Her body language screaming mommy don’t go. I knew she would be ok later; every time I called to check on her she was fine. But it didn’t change the way I felt in that moment. It didn’t stop tears from filling my lap as I drove to work each morning.
Inside I felt awful. It’s a dilemma so many of us mamas face. We want to be there by our baby’s side and yet we want to ensure that our family’s needs are met. Yes, the decision to return to working outside the home was one made with a lot of thought, prayer and discussion. Yes I knew it was going to be one of the hardest things I had ever done. But no, I didn’t realize it would hurt so much. I didn’t know that my morning commute would be filled with tears, that I would see other peoples’ babies and long to be beside my own, that I would struggle with feelings of guilt and start to question my decision. All I knew is that above all I wanted my baby to be better than ok. I didn’t want tears to be the last thing I saw. I didn’t want to close the door behind me saying goodbye while she was still reaching. How I desperately wanted to reach back.
And then one day we walked into the classroom, together we put away her things and into her teacher’s arms she went. And when it was time to say goodbye she looked at me and waved.
This week my littlest turned 19-months-old. For some reason month 18 felt like a huge deal. For starters, it was closer to two than we had ever been! Month 18 was wildly different than the ones before. Not just because my baby had grown bigger and had become more independent, but because I had made the transition back to work outside of the home. Rather than watching her play and discover all day I was waiting to hear the stories the teachers told my husband when he picked her up — hoping he remembered every detail so that I could hang onto them. How I long for the days of yesterday. But with my longing comes the realization that time is even more precious than I perceived it to be. It is almost as if the minutes, hours and days go by even faster than they did before. In the blink of an eye here we were. Here we are. In this particular month there were fewer photos of captured moments but there was also an increased effort to savor them. To immerse myself in them.
In celebration of month 18 – a month unlike all the rest and yet still undeniably sweet, I wanted to share a few favorite memories. Here are some favorite Instagram photos from month 18:
It’s been fun to watch Lola’s interests change over time. To see the things that capture her attention for a few moments and the things that seem to fascinate her garnering her attention time and time again.
At 19 months there are a few things (beyond bananas and blueberries) that my little Lola doesn’t just like but loves:
With spring officially here I’ve already begun thinking of some of the adventures I hope to take my girls on. Adventures of the outdoor kind tend to be favorites for our family this time of year. Rather than being too hot, the weather tends to be just right. Splashing in the pool and even heading to the beach are on our itinerary but first we need proper attire and what better way to usher in spring than with a new swimsuit and matching accessories?